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In the most riveting section, it prints first-person descriptions of daters' experiences, as if several hundred Carrie Bradshaws were all shouting at once. It is, as a passion textbook, an utter turn-off - mean, sterile, oddly loveless. Soulmates, you see, has taken its case studies from a tiny puddle of pseudo-intellectual urban metrosexuals, and they are very irritating people.

It tells you how to write a pouting profile, how to juggle 42 men before lunch and how to avoid psychos, liars and bores.

In the pre-internet days, we didn't really go on dates.

Reactions to the controversial Spear painting of President Jacob Zuma has showed South Africa has a legacy its citizens must understand better, Nic Dawes, editor-in-chief of the Mail & Guardian says.

Rather, you want them to stay lonely and eventually, in the words of that iconic dater Bridget Jones, 'be eaten by dogs'. (That is another irritating thing about Soulmates - they are all too suspicious to give their real names to potential lovers so they have unfunny online pseudonyms like Empty The Bin or Buy Me AFuse or Kill Me Now.) Global_Gadabout (36, female) is a typical Soulmate.

She goes on a date with someone called Gordon who is clearly a terrible person.

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Got to take a breather for now, reconciling with an old flame I found here.

' Global_Gadabout duly freaks out, for she has been wronged. ' she wails, with all the thwarted melodrama of Jane Eyre discovering Rochester has a mad wife in the attic. Even when they like their dates, they are insufferable.

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