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Several people were talking, while some, just stood awkwardly.

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Behavioral extremes indicate a power play is being employed. Once we have the ability to see hot and cold for what it is, we’re less likely to suffer its negative effects.

It’s long been the rule that when dating someone whose behavior is marked by hot and cold reactivity, you’re standing on shaky ground.

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One minute you’re high on the warmth of their attention, the next minute you’re frozen out and left wondering what happened. Whether you call it push/pull, on/off, or hot and cold, the end result is the same. Whether done consciously or unconsciously, this type of behavior activates longing and pursuit. If we don’t understand the game of hot and cold, we can find ourselves pulled into a drama of confusion. Understanding this type of behavior is crucial even for those of you committed to not playing games.

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What was once readily available is suddenly gone, and no matter how hard we try to regain our partner’s former affection, it now seems beyond our reach. They don’t need more time to figure out their emotions. The “hot” phase begins with a bang of overwhelming recognition. Bathed in newfound attention, flattery and flirtation spark a strong attraction for this person.

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